My thesis concert is now about praxis. Praxis is the process by which a theory, lesson, or skill is enacted, embodied, or realized. "Praxis" may also refer to the act of engaging, applying, exercising, realizing, or practicing ideas. I've written about ethos and mythos and semiotics and now it is time to cultivate my own praxis.
I wonder if that would be a good thesis title. I have been holding 'Queer Incarnate Flesh' as possible title for my thesis concert but maybe I'll consider Praxis too.
What does this mean? It means that I've gotten really clear about who I am, what I believe, how I want to be in the world, what kind of work I want to make....and now it's time to live it. To embody myself and my work. To bring it.
Praxis is the thing that I truly miss from Christianity. I have felt the void of not having spiritual practices. My body is my temple. It's time for me to really manifest praxis. I want my thesis concert to be a practice in making work like I want to when I graduate. I am creating a budget, a timeline, taking out another loan to pay for it all (UGH), writing a contract for my dancers. I need to have a very disciplined schedule for manifesting all of this. I have two films to complete; music to figure out; my ancestral wall installation; moss walls to grow; costumes to figure out; a thesis paper to write; and 4 sections of dance/performance art/movement to choreograph. I need to be accountable to myself. I want to have a dance company when I graduate. I want to make work, get grants and pay my dancers. In order for this to work I have to be professional. Accountable. I need a praxis.
It's a hard edge for me. Coming out of a form of Christianity that emphasized self denial, righteousness and discipline makes me rebellious to these things. Hence my obsession with unruliness and transgression and wildness. However, limitation breeds creativity and I actually thrive with boundaries, repetition and strong rhythm. I mean, I'm a ballet dancer. Of course I do. If I don't have a schedule I'm gonna go off course. I'm trying to do a LOT here. And I can do it. My budget is almost finished. I'm meeting with financial aid tomorrow to discuss financing. I am getting my dancers firmed up. And then I will create my work schedule. I will update this post with my budget and schedule, hopefully by the end of the weekend.